Sunday, March 02, 2008

high school - - - -


I just got off the phone with someone who was a year ahead of me in school.

Let me back up some:

I was in choir in high school, as was "M". As I remember she had a very nice Soprano I voice - I was more of a Soprano II or Alto I (?? memory can be a fuzzy thing at times). M always struck me as a one of those popular types, not really "I'm better than you" but maybe a little - or at least that's how I felt. We were never really close other than me knowing who she was, and if she knew who I was, it was news to me.

Fast forward 13 years, (oh God is it really that many...). M comes into the store that I'm working in. As I'm helping her I recognize her voice but don't say anything. She mentions that I look familiar and I mention school. "Oh yes! That's it!" she says. We get to talking, exchange numbers and talk about getting together.

M called tonight and we made plans for tomorrow night. We were talking on the phone and I mentioned checking out the old yearbook and looking up how we were then. M then says "All I remember about high school is being full of insecurity." We continue our conversation and firm up plans for tomorrow night.

Thinking back, M didn't strike me as insecure - not even the typical teenage things. Then again, at that age myself everyone seemed more "in place" and "together" than I was. It seemed almost shocking to me that M felt insecure back then. I just remember her in choir, with a voice I envied (although I would have liked it more in the Alto range.... : ) and the popularity I wished I had.

Really - - - - Is that how life goes?

Everyone else is feeling the same things you are but they just "fake it" as much as you do?

M said something else tonight that struck me "God puts people into your life for a reason". While I've always liked and believed that statement, I guess I've never thought it applied to me being the person "put into" anyone's life.

damn high school and those insecurities.....

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